This is driving me crazy!

Simon's Dashboard

It is time, my friends, to let you all in on a little secret: when I moved to this country from America in 1991 I stopped driving. I have had a driving licence since I was seventeen, so I drove for ten years or so like a normal person, but once I switched countries for some reason I became a ‘drivee’ rather than a ‘driver.’ Why I did this I am not exactly sure, but despite plans to remedy the situation when the children were small (largely so that my husband didn’t have to do all of the driving), I never did anything about it.

In some ways being a non-driver has been beneficial; I am a great walker and so are my children—“if Mummy is taking us to the playground, cinema, chip shop, etc, we are walking”-in fact, I could argue that I have done them a great service by fostering their appreciation of their legs as a mode of transport (I notice that many of their friends do not share this outlook!).

I’ll admit that I had more or less planned to be chauffeured for the rest of my days by the time I decided to apply for the NW Manager position with Aid to the Church in Need. As you know I somehow was lucky enough to be appointed and am thankful every day that I applied for this job. The only stipulation set before me was that I must get myself a UK driving licence. “No problem”, I thought, “I already know how to drive; all I have to do is do it on the other side of the road and with a standard transmission.” How hard could this actually be?

Well, let me tell you, it has been hard—I mean, very, very, very hard.  For starters I come from the land of HUGE, gas-guzzling houses on wheels and have never had to change a gear in my life.  Furthermore, over 20 years of not driving has meant that I am, naturally, a bit rusty, but unfortunately I have discovered that what you never lose about driving is all of the sneaky corners that you begin to cut once you have passed your test. You know what I mean—all drivers do it: do you cross your hands over each other when you steer? Or coast with the clutch down when you are turning corners or going down hills? Or not bother to signal when changing lanes because no one else is bothering? Or ignore cycle lanes and position your car too far to the left?  When people joke and say that they would never pass their test if they had to take it again tomorrow, BELIEVE THEM because, for most of us, it would be true.

Anyway,  after weeks of cramming lessons into my spare time and trying to bring myself up to speed (forgive the pun!) with my new job, I am now about to take a driving test. I am petrified—I don’t remember being this scared on my 17th birthday when, after 6 one-hour lessons and a few weeks of cruising around my hometown in my father’s estate car, I took my first test! Simon, the world’s most patient driving instructor, says not too worry and that I’ll be fine as long as I remain calm (and check my mirrors a million times and approach roundabouts really slowly and remember to straighten out my wheels before I reverse when executing a 3-point turn and…I could go on and on and on…). I am trying to have faith in myself and what Simon says and that God will help me pass this test so I can concentrate fully on my work for Aid to the Church in Need.

What can you do? You can say some prayers for me, that’s what! Just like when I say the Angelus all by myself in my dining room and I suddenly feel part of a community working together to help others, knowing that my readers are supporting me while I go through this rather stressful ordeal will make all the difference to me. Please stop for a minute around 2:27pm on Monday and say a little prayer for me—I’ll fill you in when I write my next entry. Argh….  

Thanks for reading!  Caroline